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So whose fault is it then that all these MPs have been claiming for all kinds of absurd things?

Theyíre all shouting that they didnít break the rules when a modicum of common sense would have shown them that claiming for fixing the moat is not a proper use of taxpayerís money. Nor is claiming for your manís naughty movies.

Iíd say the fault lies in the rules themselves. Theyíve grown out of an era when an MP was a trusted, powerful person (like a doctor) and people knew a good deal less about how the House worked. Thatís changed of course and in this day of greater openness, thanks to our beloved internet, itís much harder to hide what youíre getting up to. People will naturally take whatever they can, the ďif heís doing it then I can tooĒ excuse and the rules havenít kept up with the technology.

Itís time to simplify these rules so they are absolutely clear to all. For instance:
    An MPs first residence is his/her address in the constituency from which they came
    Unless that constituency is in one of the four parliamentary capitals, e.g., London, Edinburgh, Cardiff and Belfast, they may rent a residence in the relevant city, close to the parliament in which they W***
    If the place isnít furnished then a capped allowance might be made to cover that
    A proportion of the mortgage if the MP decides to buy may be paid, up to the equivalent monthly rent for a property in that area.
    Both of these should have an upper limit applied
    They may claim for the cost of food, rent and utilities, including council tax and a basic phone/internet package (no TV)
    These may be claimed for whatever time they spend in the second residence, but not for time spent in their own constituency
    They may claim travel expenses up to an agreed limit (standard or economy)
    If they choose to drive, they can claim a petrol allowance (capped)
    On first being elected, hotel bills may be paid for up to three months, for the MP only, no one else
    They may claim or be granted the cost of a suitable travel card, or a petrol allowance for travel within the city

Anything else comes out of their own money.
Boudleaux C Merkin

How cum they kin claim fur food, annat?

SOP when yer w***kin awa frae hame. But it's no a canonical list.

Ah'd seener see accommodation an travel provided bi the parliament, i.e. a block o flats that belongs tae the parliament, an travel warrants or vouchers tae an fae the constituency. Obviously, an MP for Shetland will need mair expensive travel than an MP for Sheffield, and an MP for Surrey winna need tae travel much avaa.

Staff should be directly employed by the parliament, nae pit on expenses. They should be public servants wi proper Emp******t contracts, pensions, etc.

Aye, guid idea.

Ah suppose the argument against thon wid be security. If they wiz a' bidin' in ra same howf, wan weel placed bo......

Akshly, Neil, come tae think o' it, Ah hink yer ontae sum'hin'!

Aye, there is the security argument richt enough. But there's nae reason the bomb cuidna be placed at their w**kplace, or thon office buildin that cost mair'n the Scottish Parliament.

There's also nae reason the parliament cuidna buy or lease flats or hooses scattered aa ower the place raither'n concentrated in a single block. Ah've heard a suggestion that the 2012 Olympic athletes' village cuid dae duty as MPs' accommodation.

Hmm, ah dinna think ye'd even need a b**b. Aw ye need is tae ensure atra lowest bidder, Messrs Bodgett & Runne get ra contract. Three years efter ra hing wuid clapse inty it's ain foundations an squish ra lottae thum.

Glasgow Councillors expenses for last year are available  

Boudleaux C Merkin

notanimby wrote:

Very Happy  Very Happy  Very Happy

Haha, good yin, notanimby!   Laughing

Thur drappin like flies noo. Rerr entertainment soitis.
Boudleaux C Merkin

It's great. innit?  Very Happy  Arrogant bastirts gettin' therr comeuppance. Ah'm gonna be very, very perticular aboot who Ah vote fur in the near future. Greens, Monster Raving Loonies, Independent  Lesbian Nazis, Dependent Lesbian Nazis, Gay White Residents, Gay Black Residents in fact Ah might even staun' mahsel'. Ah've been in touch wi' Esther Rants-on but she reckons mah teeth urnae big enuff fur hur party.
God Bless democracy.

Evin that tory tosser bill cash is at it, wae a name like that he should huv been numero uno furra torygraph tae investigate.

And still they cannae see whitra problem is........................

Weel that's another three doon. Home Secretary Jackie Smith is leavin the cabinet - she's the wan that claimed back public munt for hur man's porn fillums.

Former Health Secretary Patricia Hewitt is staunin doon as an MP at the next election but says the move has nowt attaw tae dae wi the expenses furore. Aye right.

Children's minister Beverley Hughes has also announced said she will stand down due to "family circumstances".

Geoff Hoon apologises for claimin bills in advance for a full year on a Derbyshire property - but in the same year he claimed a different house was his second home. He's peyed money back tae.

And the Chancellor of the fuggin Exchequer Alistair Darling hus hud tae pey money back as weel. Gordon Broon says Mr Darling had made an "inadvertent" mistake and did a "great job" as chancellor. So Broon's mair or less condonin corruption amongst his troops ehno?

Aye there ur some MP's wi thur integrity still intact, but ah honestly hope the rest uv the theivin corrupt bastirts that huv been linin thur pockets at oor expense ur harangued until they huv nae option but tae resign as weel.

Seein as ah dinnae buy ra Torygraff ah've only been hearin aw this secondhaun as it were. But for the benefit uv spreadin the sordid info tae as many fowk as possible, auld Auntie Beeb hus a hail webpage gie'in aw the sordid details.

Ah want tae see mair scalps.

If these ur ra best people tae be runnin ra country, how come they make so many mistakes wae thur expenses
Makes yoo wunner how bad the shite people must be.......

The Queen and Prince Philip are talking.

Queen: Philip, one has come to a monumental decision.

Philip: Not again Liz! Last time you did that we ended up having Edward.

Queen: No! I'm going to dissolve parliament, all these money grabbing b*stards
running the country.

Philip: What! Who is going to bloody run it then?

Queen: We are. The whole family!

Philip: What like the fe*king Mafia?

Queen: Look you can run the Foreign Office, you're good with Jonny foreigner.

Philip: True.

Queen: And we have natural leaders for every job in the cabinet - Charles can
handle the environment, Zara can do sport and of course Harry can
handle immigration policy!

Philip: Actually on reflection it's a great idea!

Queen: Too right it is............... Now, Windsor or Balmoral?

Philip: What about them?

Queen: For the second home allowance!
Fey Hag

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