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Heidy

Dae we let him in or naw?

He hus bin whinin at ra door fur a wee while noo dae we let him in oot the cauld? Laughing
AG

Exactly who ur ye gaun oan aboot?
notanimby

AG wrote:
Exactly who ur ye gaun oan aboot?


Tell me tae
dosser

Whit they sed.
dosser

But Ah've votit "aye" a' the same.
AG

notanimby wrote:

Tell me tae


Ah suspect Heidy'll no ken hissel. Thon post wis made at 12.15am so he'd probly jist hud his midnight meds and wis feelin a wee bitty mair confyoosed than usual afore the pills kicked in.

Cool
notanimby

AG wrote:
notanimby wrote:

Tell me tae


Ah suspect Heidy'll no ken hissel. Thon post wis made at 12.15am so he'd probly jist hud his midnight meds and wis feelin a wee bitty mair confyoosed than usual afore the pills kicked in.

Cool


Jings tae christ, he must be bad then as he sounds bad enuff dyoorin daylight 'oors
Heidy

Whit issit wi youse shower o diddys? Its blaytinitlie obvious that Ahm oan aboot Alba who is aye whinin fur votes an jist ra ur day wis askin tae get made a mod in here an Hollie bit his baws........
AG

Ah've ayewis thought thit mods wur nancy boays. Werrin thon awfy parka coats an drivin Lambretta's wi hunners ay mirrors tae admire thursels in an comb thur quiffs.

Ah widda been a rockir wi a motur bike an leathur jaikit. If ah hudnae been aboot sevin year auld.
weejan

if Mrs Alba reads this then it was HOOLIE that bit his baws and not a woman called Hollie.  Laughing
admin

Weel that's jist whit's needed aroon here. A mair robust approach tae moderatin'.......


Hoolie's done a guid enough job, but Ah prefer Hollie's style.

Hollie is hereby appointit moderator.
AG

Um ah missin sumthin here?

Jined up only this very day and husnae made ony poasts. Who the feck is this Hollie?

Alba might be wan uv thon scheming coontint types but at least we trus... erm ah mean ken who he is.
Hollie

You bite one - just one - member's baws and........

Well, if that's the attitude to newbies on this forum, no wonder you get so few new members.
Hoolie

Lissin Dossuur ya bastirt ,Ah me masel ken fine that Mr Hiedie is gettin oan a bit an evin wi his aw singin aw dansin litey up keboord he kin make ra odd mistake noo an agen so get thon usurpuur tae fuck affy ma cherrbaskit an re-instate me in ma ritefu pless as a mod in here or yer familie jeweils wull be gettin a rite guid chowin .....
No that Ahm thretinin ye mind but ther wull be consekwensis is ma polite request isny attendidt tae toot suet!
admin

Ah sense a rammy a brewin'. In the interests o' peace and harmony, Ah've adjustit ra moderator list.

In order no' tae upset Heidi, Alba's position is will be decidit when Heidi's coontit a' ra votes.
AG

Aw naw. Jan-yoo-urry hus obviussly been far ower much an wur mod boay hus blawn a fyoose.

Ah dinnae want tae be included in yer mod list!!!

Ah've spent ma entire life avoidin responsibility.

Shocked
alba

this is a shyte crooked fuckin poll an ahm huvin nuthin tae dae wey it ya shower ah bastirts.

3-3 tho..................no bad that really awe things (crooked) considerrd.
Neil

If Ah'm gaen tae be made a moderatur wi'oot ma consent Ah demand an extra vote. Rank huz its privlidges ye ken.
dosser

admin wrote:
Alba's position is will be decidit when Heidi's coontit a' ra votes.


Ah think Ah see a wee Catch-22 style logistical proablem here. A doddery auld bugger like Heidi's gonnae need a coonint tae help him wi' the coontin o' ra votes...... And he's no' oan my client list.
notanimby

Every wan's a moderator noo, its like Spartacus
alba

Nimby an Neil...ah jist want tae say that ah luv yies baith. Dosser, nuff said..thanks mate.

But back tae Nimby and Neil...........if yie huvnie votied yit, I'm coming back tae Scotland in March and there's a wee parsill ah Canaydeyin stuff (deed moose annat) which is yours fur the taking. That's awe ah'm saying.......an nae need tae vote fur me....jist ah wee thanks fur beein great people.

Need tae go cos the hoolie needs tae go furra pee..if yie want him annaw...done deal.
Neil

Ah've aariddy votit ae time, but Ah'm waitin for ma secind moderatur's vote. Ah'll be votin naw, like Ah did the first time.

Ah'm a vegetarian an ma dog isna gettin tae acquire a taste for deid moose, so Ah canna be bocht that easily. Fit else huv ye got?
weejan

if you're giving away the hoolie, then I'll have him.

I was just guessing that Hollie was a woman, of course I could be wrong, Hollie was a male in Red Dwarf but


erm what was I on about? my head is switched off today
Heidy

Who evuur is responsibil an we aw huv a guid idea who fur aw thon bloo beanie ritin fur mods get it tae fuck afore we become a laffin stawk.... mind you we canny get rid o the shame an undesirabilitie o huvin thon outcast Alba in oor midst....
admin

Heidy wrote:
afore we become a laffin stawk....


Whit de ye mean wi' "afore"?
AG

Is afore no whit ye're supposed tae shout oot when yer gowf baw's headin for sumbody's nappur?
Heidy

Naw thats fower ye daft auld twat,am omywey whit wid you ken aboot gowf apart frae ra fact that ye wis a boay when it wis inventit? Laughing
Heidy

Haw Alba annat whit um Ah gettin when ye come ower ra pond annat? eh whit um Ah gettin seein as Ahm pittin yersel an ra dragin wummin up in ma shed an Hoolie is gettin the guest bedroom?
alba

that's Neil gettinfuckawe the. Embdy want sum moose??
Heidy

Ye didny ansir me whit aboot meeeeeeeee...yer auld  paaaaaaaaaaaalllllllll annat? Cool
Neil

Ah see the vote's gaen weel. Gae's ma secint vote an Ah'll mak siccer.
alba

whit's "siccer" then?? issit a posh Aberdeen name fur fitba??
swift

nice um um:

Ay well,
isnae THAT funny.....well mibee tae some
och, am awa, the keyboard has wee bits of pan fried tattie, mibee some bread and off course the tea......the orangie bits could be frae the beans.
swift
Neil

Och... the historical ignorance... it's enough tae mak a cheil even siccer.
salamander-dundee

sum o' us socks got thegither........... It's no' lookin' guid, Alba auld pal.
AG

Haw yoo. If ye're sumdy's sock ye canny huv anithur vote.

Fuxache aw yoos powir crazed kunts ur the same. Ye'll be auctionin powir lunches wi yersel for vast fees, scoffin sossij rolls ootside Greigs next.

Cool
alba

7-4.........ya shower ah fukin..................errm...nice people annat.

I respect the judgemint of the shower ah numptie....errrm..nice people in here....an ah will respectfully withdraw ma nominayshin furra nice um um um um mod............ahm no greetin aboot it..........the other fiftie ah yies thit wur up fur the shitey posishin huv won ferr an skwerr. Well, I'm greetin ah wee bit. Actually, I'm surprized that the keyboard is still wurkin the noo wey awe that watir innit........its' Been a #8&56 time >WEY &*^%@+_9 but ah love**&^$@= Neil and *^&% Fey an *&%$* FUCK *&^%!_!)@&@) but I'm gawnie be okay so thanks fur the %*(&!@)(&*!)(*&8....................
notanimby

alba wrote:
7-4.........ya shower ah fukin..................errm...nice people annat.

I respect the judgemint of the shower ah numptie....errrm..nice people in here....an ah will respectfully withdraw ma nominayshin furra nice um um um um mod............ahm no greetin aboot it..........the other fiftie ah yies thit wur up fur the shitey posishin huv won ferr an skwerr. Well, I'm greetin ah wee bit. Actually, I'm surprized that the keyboard is still wurkin the noo wey awe that watir innit........its' Been a #8&56 time >WEY &*^%@+_9 but ah love**&^$@= Neil and *^&% Fey an *&%$* FUCK *&^%!_!)@&@) but I'm gawnie be okay so thanks fur the %*(&!@)(&*!)(*&8....................


Christ ah huvnae seen so much tears and snotters since ah wizza wean watchin Captains Couraejus
Neil

A wean? Thon fillum maun gar me greet ovnoo!

Ah howp ye mean the een wi Spencer Tracey an Lionel Barrymore in't, nae some shoddy copy. Huz there been a remake?
Fey Hag

Richt ah'n uv ra new glesses
Whar de ah vote 'n fer whit? Shocked
Heidy

Weel Fey Ah wid huv recomendit that ye vote accordin tae how much munt thon coontitntAlba hus stole aff ye ower ra years but Ah see masel that sumwan hus fidilt ra vote thingy an Ah hiv a guid idea who it wis ,ra loabstuur torchurrin currint that he is or Ah wid noo be declayrin that ra aforesais Alba wis allowit inty this sacrid 4 um...
See Paaaaaal Ah um oan your side annat.....soook sooook.....
notanimby

Neil wrote:
A wean? Thon fillum maun gar me greet ovnoo!

Ah howp ye mean the een wi Spencer Tracey an Lionel Barrymore in't, nae some shoddy copy. Huz there been a remake?


Ther huz indeed been a remake (pish) ah dae in fact mean ra spencer tracy wan wur he dies at ra end
AG

Stey weel ootae it aw Fey. Gie'd the unskroopyoolis involvmints uv certin fowk (nae nemms nae pack drill annat) dinnae git involved attaw.

Ah'm sayin feckaw aboot hangin chads byraway.

Cool
Heidy

See yer hingin chads AG,yer Doc wull gie ye a cream fur thum if ther itchin that bad.............
Pee Ess an if yer fotie oan a sertin betwirkin site is onythin tae go by ther gien ye a loada grief ranoo......hehehehehehe Wink
AG

Heidy wrote:
sertin betwirkin site


Fur yer iloossidayshin annat, ah huv nevir been in a bookie's shoap in ma puff an ah widnae even ken how tae pit a bet oan.

And ma dukes ur weel unner control annaw ta.  Cool
alba

Sooooooooo.......ahm ah in or whit??


Ah know yies ur jist kiddin aboot.......cos the votes ur jist obviously rigged.
Yie jist go intae the admin pannil an chinje the....errm.......well ah huv heard that yie kin dae that but no bein an admin enywhair ah widnie know enything aboot it. Heidie telt me.

See?? ah never edited fuckawe.......last edited by Heidie right eftir ALBA posted oan here

Heidie is a good man an ah luv him tae bits soadae

Last edited by Heidie on Fri Feb 12, 2010 2:24 am; edited 7 times in total
alba

bastirts.
admin

Ah................... If only he had even once said, Pretty Please. Heidy.
dosser

Ah....... If only Heidy wiz blest wi' a mair kindly, charitable an' forgiving nature.


Akshly, has any o' youze ever found yersel's wonderin' if Heidy is really jist Clash's sock? Consider ra evvydince - ther baith mizrabul bastirts.
notanimby

dosser wrote:
Ah....... If only Heidy wiz blest wi' a mair kindly, charitable an' forgiving nature.


Akshly, has any o' youze ever found yersel's wonderin' if Heidy is really jist Clash's sock? Consider ra evvydince - ther baith mizrabul bastirts.


Ah kin see whur yer comin frae, but...............ah huvnae any evidensh of Clash no' knowin ra diffrinsh between a paint splash and a crack
alba

classic
Heidy

Oan ra basis o that piece o pre-war tv shyte Its a deffo no-no tae lettin this crazy bean coontuur onywher near a 4 um in ma view,tho mibbes some o yese diffur and want tae gie him a chance? Rolling Eyes
admin

By ra powers vestit in me by virtue o' a accident whit happened when ra site wis bein' set up, and seein' as Heidy's loast a' interest in ra ootcome o' ra poll, and seein' as ALBA's silence is oabviously a indykayshin o' a mega-huff-in-progress, Ah've decidit tae let him in ferra trial period only which'll end any time Ah like.
weejan

fairy nuff
Heidy

Right he hus hud his chance o a reply so fukim let him back oot again..... Very Happy
admin

admin wrote:
Ah've decidit tae let him in ferra trial period only which'll end any time Ah like.


Heidy,

While wan disnae want tae come across like a complete meggly-maniac nor nu'hin', ra maist important bits o' mah post is highlited  in ra above quote.
weejan

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

whose the daddy?
Fey Hag

alba wrote:
classic


Those fashions ur hilarious  Laughing

Whar's ra vote plece?
alba

8 tae 5 is shyte.  It's a fix.


Fey...get in therr wey at least 4 votes. Send me an email an ah will show yie how tae dae it cos ah kin oanly vote 5 times.......an mean errm.... wance oan wan compewtirr. Ahemm.
alba

Ah keep tryin tae vote merr times but sum numptie keeps deletin ma newly created membership applikayshins...ah mean...the applikayshins fae ma mates an Fey an Clash an Hiedie an they awe cannie vote fur sum reasin.

So two extra poasts is like 8-7 the noo.....no countin eny ither wans that might appear.
alba

Issis no me.....jist checkin if they huv fixed the problem wey the votin. 8-8.
alba

Is emby coontin this brw??............13-8 fur moi.
Fey Hag

Get  ra bluidy gleses fixed Alba! Shocked
admin

admin wrote:
By ra powers vestit in me by virtue o' a accident whit happened when ra site wis bein' set up, and seein' as Heidy's loast a' interest in ra ootcome o' ra poll, and seein' as ALBA's silence is oabviously a indykayshin o' a mega-huff-in-progress, Ah've decidit tae let him in ferra trial period only which'll end any time Ah like.


See, issis ra trubble wi' you, Alba. Ye dinnae read ither fowlk posts; ye especially ignore mine.........

Ah tried tae be a guid kristyin an' let ye in....... And whit dae ye dae? Eh? Eh? Ye bide awa', that's whit ye dae, ye ungratefu' wee Kanuk bastirt!

Nah! Dinnae  try tae 'pollygise noo!  Ye're ower late. Mah feelin's is hurt an' Ah feel a huff cummin' oan. A bad huff. Sae bad, in fact, that Ah'm thinkin' o' gi'en a' yer moderatin' joab tae Holly.

However, bein' ra guid kristyin whit Ah am, Ah'll gie ye a "Right o' Appeal."

Ah wull pm ye wi' mah sort code, account number and full instructions as tae how tae gang aboot yer appeal.

Either that or ye cuild get aff yer frost-bitten erse an' poast sum'hin' wance in a while.

As we huv seen, ra vote cuild gang onyway, even at this late stage.
admin

Ah jist came back tae add that even Clash huz postit mair than you - annat's wi'oot him ever even bein' sober enough tae jist cheat an' jist fill in a' ra UM's!. Where's yer pride? Huv ye nae sense o'shame?
Fey Hag

Dinna fash Alba, yir looved 'n wantit.

As ra Auzzi's wud sey 'Whar ra bluidy hell ar yea?'


Admin is hayin a wee off dee; nuthin a guid heid bilin wudnae fix. Wink
alba

ah'm busy. ded busy. awe this finanshill crisis stuff is drivin me up the wa wey extra stuff ah need tae dae tae tidy up ra books annat.

Enywey.ah'll no be oan attaw furra next two weeks as ah'm travelling aboot your part ah the wurld.. an nixt Thursday ah wull be at the Fulham vs Juventus gemme......

YEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
admin

Heidy, hae a wurd wi' him will ye.

Efter a' ra many hours an' days we've hud o' intense discushin an' soul searchin', we agree tae let him in.

So whit diz he dae? Eh? He buggers aff tae a fitb......

Ah gie in.......
alba

ah wiz gawnie get yie a scarf tae.

travel plans.

1. London furra fitba.........Les Blancs an Juve an Les Blancs an Man Shitty.
2. Go tae Heidies fur dinner
3. Embra.
4. Go tae Heidies fur dinner
5. Aberdeen
6. Go tae Heides fur dinner.
7. Dublin.
8. Go tae Heidies fur dinner again an hope it's no they wee fishies again.
9. Paris furra day, then Barcelona furra fitba.
10, Heidies fur fuckin (wee, minature) fish an chips again. My, that tank looks a bit empty noo eh?
11. Art galleries, Pollok, an doon tae Troon.
12. Hiedies fur dinner...escargot the night. Tank looks a bit dirty the noo.
13. San Murran vs The Berrs.
14. Back tae Heidies furra farewell dinner..........jist chips the night.
Heidy

alba wrote:
ah wiz gawnie get yie a scarf tae.

travel plans.

1. London furra fitba.........Les Blancs an Juve an Les Blancs an Man Shitty.
2. Go tae Heidies fur dinner   heidie calls polis
3. Embra.
4. Go tae Heidies fur dinner heidie sets dugs oan him
5. Aberdeen
6. Go tae Heides fur dinner. heidie shouts at him tae get tae fuck
7. Dublin.
8. Go tae Heidies fur dinner again an hope it's no they wee fishies again. heidie gets boay tae go oot an fudd Albas erse
9. Paris furra day, then Barcelona furra fitba.
10, Heidies fur fuckin (wee, minature) fish an chips again. My, that tank looks a bit empty noo eh? heidie calls back up mob tae deal wi iss pest
11. Art galleries, Pollok, an doon tae Troon.
12. Hiedies fur dinner...escargot the night. Tank looks a bit dirty the noo. heidie looks oot his gun
13. San Murran vs The Berrs.
14. Back tae Heidies furra farewell dinner..........jist chips the night. heidie takes pity oan starvin canuk an thraws him a bone...fir hoolie  


This wulny happin cos he disny ken whaur Ah live....
Fey Hag

Yea ken that time yea luiked oot yir front winda while tawkin tae me on yir fancy setoop we awl ra bells 'n whistles?

Ah soor ra Street meme an ra number.

Hoow much no tae tell Alba?
weejan

dear heidy
who is heidie? is this your evil twin that lives in the cellar?
love
a friend
Heidy

Dear weejay...thon wey isny ma evil twin Ah hiv enuff evil fur the baith o us ...its jist ra wey that thon dislexik,Ah wunner whit the wurd is fur sumwan that canny read figures is? ony wey its the wey thon tit Alba spells ma nemm an sumtimes its catchin... Embarassed
SengaMcp

At least he's nae cawin ye Heidi ony mair. Twisted Evil
weejan

it is called dyscalculia and I have it.

I can do basic maths, I know the tables because of the way we were taught at school (chanting them every morning) but anything more complicated and my mind goes blank. I also have co-ordination trouble so I can't swim or dance or follow keep fit videos properly.
My infant/junior school refused to accept that number blindness as it was called in the 60's existed and so I got slapped and thumped a lot for being lazy and stupid. ~~~ until the day my mum snapped and went to the school and did some shouting and threatening of her own. After that the teacher was always nice to me - I have a great mum.

luckily I am married to someone who is very good at maths.
SengaMcp

weejan wrote:
it is called dyscalculia and I have it.

I can do basic maths, I know the tables because of the way we were taught at school (chanting them every morning) but anything more complicated and my mind goes blank. ... luckily I am married to someone who is very good at maths.


Me too. I still remember the inchworm song.
Heidy

Dae yese baith realise whit yese hiv dun err? By admitin tae yer inumerancy ye hiv opint ra fludgates fur the arch crook an arsehole Alba tae pestuur ye furevuurmerr tae "dae yer books an fiddil yer acconts fur ye" at a nominil fee of course...doant say Ah didny warn yese...
An thon goes fur thon semi arch crook Dossuur...weel AG telt me he wis an who uma tae disagree.... Twisted Evil
dosser

Heidy wrote:

An thon goes fur thon semi arch crook Dossuur...


Thon is a outrageous calumny an' a slur oan mah proffesional reputation and Ah demand a apology!

"Semi", indeed!
notanimby

Ma 'coontint is trooly wunnerful..........................................
Heidy

Yer ur ainlie semi cos ye canny evin spell profeshnil rite ya erse...haw haw haw!
dosser

And has been pointit oot elsewhere, Heidi, you cannae even spell yer ane name richt!
Heidy

Away you an lie oan yer side its that currint Alba thats aye spellin it wrang!
Oh aye an thats me filt in aw ra 4 ums...haw haw fuggin haw...!
notanimby

jist tae fek up heidy
alba

ey disnie need eny help therr............hehehehehe
Heidy

Well se'in ye gave ma hoose a boadie swerve ya cheeky bastirt ye Alba!
notanimby

Heidy wrote:
Well se'in ye gave ma hoose a boadie swerve ya cheeky bastirt ye Alba!


Hoose yoo say! in DUMBarton! ha ha ha ha ha ha
alba

Ah wis in Greenock...so ah saw yer hoose fae ackroas the watirr.........send yie ah foatie ey it.  I'm guessin yoors wis the wan wey nae lights oan.
notanimby

alba wrote:
Ah wis in Greenock...so ah saw yer hoose fae ackroas the watirr.........send yie ah foatie ey it.  I'm guessin yoors wis the wan wey nae lights oan.



Yoo wurr in Greenock, yoo should huv tellt me, ah would huv bought yoo dinner
alba

Steyed in South Street...............very noice.
Heidy

Ah hiv tae say here that Ah umverry disappointit wi ye Alba comin away ower here an slummin it in  geenok an no visitin yer pal..
sniff dreep...... Crying or Very sad
notanimby

alba wrote:
Steyed in South Street...............very noice.



Depends whit bit - some of it (the eastern end of it) is a bit dodgy nooadays.

Wiz yer weddin in Greenock?
alba

Naw...ah wis merried in Sunny Pollok mate.

Laughing
Boudleaux C Merkin

Ah used tae be a message boay fur a grocer ca'ed Sam Pollock! Any relation?
notanimby

alba wrote:
Naw...ah wis merried in Sunny Pollok mate.

Laughing


Aye ha ha ha

Wiz ra weddin yoo wurr attendin back here recently in Greenock
alba

Naw...it wis called aff Nimby!!! Still tryin tae get the efferrs aff the brides mother an faithir!! Instead ah gawn tae the weddin we awe went tae Embra furra coupla days........faaantastic time. We d wee flat oan the royal mile right acroass fae.....the worlds end pub.......excafuckinlennty..........ah'll be back.

Loved Scotland....thairs no place like home.[/img]
Celyn

The Edinburgh-with-a-pub thing sounds more fun than a wedding.    Smile

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