Archive for  

        Forum Index -> The Howff

Being a Pathetique

Ah'm wishin aw yous fuckers a brammer time over Christmas and New Year.

This past year has been fucking shite because of the following reasons in no particular ordure:

Heidi died.

Gus died.

Our high heid yin Senga tried her best to kick the bucket but fucked it up due to a spanish onion.

I know weejan had a fucking rubbish time as well but she's kept it secret due to secrecy.

On the good side:

Alba is only alive due to brain dammidge.

Neil still hasn't fallen aff an Oilrig but that isny fur want of trying. Ozneil on the other hand &89)(0KHJljkl)0999 Guardian Newspaper.

The Bothy is still going (albeit lightly) which is more than kin be said for the bastards who fucked up Firstfoot.

The grate Clash is on the way tae being nighted because of bein tanned, famus an hansum: and of course having a rich wife.

What else is good?

Did I tell you that Celyn used to W*** in the Bodleian Unseen Library? She resigned when Cut-me-own-throat Dibbler started selling sossidges-ina-bun from the reception table.

I didn't think that I had kept my shitey time a secret but as I have had bad stuff since 2008, I am feeling a bit jinxed, cursed or whatever and done nothing but drop it on you lots shoulders.
But, I should be glad that I am still here, even though the bloody Tamoxifen is doing me in. If the cancer dont getcha, then the treatment will  Laughing

have a nice Christmas and New Year everyone xx

It wisnae CMOT Dibbler - it was Clash in disguise and they sossidges was minging.  And BURNT!      Shocked

Yeah, it's been a helluva year.    (Said the Rev. I.M. Jolly)   AND to add to all the sadness, I have lost my uniqueness as the only panda in Scotland.  Sob sob, greet, greet.  Yes, I realise it doesn't exactly match up to all the other forum deep sadness and loss, but I felt like joining in.

Still, the popular saying now is that Scotland has more pandas than we have Tory M.P.s, so that can't be bad.    Very Happy

I hope things get better for you, Jan.   Mibbe Clash could go to your house and scare the jinx away?   I'm sure he's big and scary enough.   And I certainly hope our Fey is bearing up.

My mention of Rikki Fulton's Rev. I.M. Jolly reminded me of this old "Children in Need" thing - Alex Salmond being Rev. Jolly.

And guess who hasn't written any christmas cards yet? Embarassed

we are a bit happier as LMWJ has a lovely new boyfriend as of a couple of weeks ago. And she has a job interview lined up for January - fingers crossed for her.

frigers crodded and noe csnnot typr 4ritfhjt.    Smile
Fey Hag

We braw friends like you lot it isnae awl bad.
Wheal its no bad unless ra bluidy greenies have hid all yir coal.
Yea canna no First foat weoot coal.
Roll on Hogmanay ah'v a wee dram & ahm makin black bun as ah type.

Made Rum 'n Raisin icecream we dark Navy rum fergot it was OP stuff.
Yea canna lick 'n drive.  Embarassed

Made orange & chocolate chip, Boysenberry, & vanilla.
That will shut up the whole clan.
Everyone has their favourite of Fey's  'Fit for the (fat) Gods' icecream.

Only made once a year.
Remind me tae give yir the recipe fer yir Summer Solstice so yea kin jiggle ra fat off roond ra flames

Very Happy
May the best ye've ever seen
Be the worst ye'll ever see
May a moose ne'er leave yer girnal
Wi' a tear drap in his e'e
May ye aye keep hale an' he'rty
Till ye're auld eneuch tae dee
May ye aye be jist as happy
As we wish ye aye tae be

Slainte.  Aye ah'v binn icecream eatin

So that wid be Walls Icecream fucked by a kiwi then?

What wis the name o that brilliant place in Musselburgh which sold the best icecream in Scotland?

So that wid be Walls Icecream fucked by a kiwi then?

What wis the name o that brilliant place in Musselburgh which sold the best icecream in Scotland?

Who's the dickheid who likes Walls icecream?
Fey Hag

Och yea dinna count numpty yir awl hot & bothered 'n need it noo.
Ah'll PM yea we it.
Tell me whit yea think.

A happy christmas tae wan an' a' fae me an' a'!

Aye Clash, yer puir deid richt. Ah reelly fucked up thon kicking ra bucket thing. Jist weel really though as ah've anurra grandchild oanra way in March. How mony's at noo, ah've loast coont? It's Nummer Fower wit's bin daein ra nasty iss time.

As fur me ahmur breethin an gettin stronger, Weeso hus fun a new joab, as rerr as hen's teeth they ur ower here ranoo. Anra ivver grawin clan McPincher is aw thrivin. An ahmur hopin thon Divvil's pact doon at Westmonster hauds furar wheen longer so ra Scots'll get sae pissed aff wi thum wull tak independinss.

Here's tae a grand year furrus aw.

Faur's Boo?

SengaMcp wrote:
Faur's Boo?

And Jawbox an' Tumshie an' Jisme an' Chookie an' abdie?

Sumbdie tell them it's begun tae liven up a wee bittie................

Aw fuck" Ah shouldnae o' said that, eh no! It'll a' go quiet again noo.

Akshly, whaur's Gowk buggert aff tae?

Ah've been right here the whole time.

        Forum Index -> The Howff
Page 1 of 1
Create your own free forum | Buy a domain to use with your forum